


Project Jeffmads

by puppycornashlynn



Series: Screaming With an F-word Somewhere In It [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Middle School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Asexual James Madison, Asexual Maria Reynolds, Autism, Background Theodosia Prevost Burr/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Bisexual Aaron Burr, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Chatting & Messaging, Crushes, Demiromantic James Madison, F/M, Gen, Homoflexible Thomas Jefferson, Homoromantic James Madison, I'm Bad At Titles, It shall be missed, Lesbian Maria Reynolds, M/M, Maria Reynolds is Maria Lewis, No Smut, Pansexual Peggy Schuyler, Pansexual Samuel Seabury, Texting, Thomas Jefferson and the Marquis de Lafayette are Twins, basically everyone's autistic, because i'm an asexual thirteen year old, i shall pioneer the homoromantic james tag mark my words, it's only implied but, james and thomas don't even realize they're crushing on each other, james is autistic, peggy and samuel are sick of it, peggy is peggy but is also probably autistic/has adhd, peggy won't leave the fourth wall alone, rip the fourth wall, samuel can break it but he leaves it alone, they're just like "oh yeah we're besties", thomas is probably autistic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:07:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27437824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puppycornashlynn/pseuds/puppycornashlynn
Summary: AKA: the first in a series of SMDR (le Southern Motherfucking Democratic Republicans) textfics.Oh yeah Peggy, Samuel (Seabury) and Maria are there too.It's not really surprising at this point.In this work, the Jeffmads boys get together.
Relationships: Margaret "Peggy" Schuyler/Samuel Seabury, Maria Reynolds/Margaret "Peggy" Schuyler, Maria Reynolds/Margaret "Peggy" Schuyler/Samuel Seabury, Thomas Jefferson/James Madison
Series: Screaming With an F-word Somewhere In It [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2004799
Kudos: 24





	1. aaaaaaa

**Author's Note:**

> The only reason Peggy and Maria are here is because Peggy is James and Thomas' best friend and Maria is Thomas' best friend.  
> Samuel's just here because Peggy made the chat.  
> ANYWAYS USERNAMES OR WHATEVER.  
> MacAndCheeseFucker - Thomas  
> SickSmol - James  
> aNd pEggY - Peggy (not really surprising tbh)  
> BritishCinnamonRoll - Samuel  
> Ay-ayron Burrito - Burr (he doesn't want to be here help him)  
> No - Maria (mood /j)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group chat gets made.  
> AKA: Hecc ensues.

**aNd pEggY** _has made a group chat._

 **aNd pEggY** _has renamed the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **aNd pEggY** _has invited_ **MacAndCheeseFucker** _,_ **SickSmol** _,_ **No** _,_ **BritishCinnamonRoll** _and_ **Ay-ayron Burrito** _to the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **BritishCinnamonRoll** _has joined the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** so question: why am i here?

 **aNd pEggY:** cuz you're my boyfirend

 **MacAndCheeseFucker** _has joined the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** s'up bitches

peggy i'm coming over to murder you

 **aNd pEggY:** if you're mad about your un, don't act like it's not accurate.

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** peggy i know you meant un as in username but i imagined you saying that thomas was mad about his united nations

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** i mean i probably would be tbh

anyways where's jemmy james?

 **aNd pEggY:** you getting horny for your boyfriend?

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** peggy keep this pg-13 p l e a se

 **aNd pEggY:** why should i?

 **SickSmol** _has joined the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** cuz the sick ace twelve-year-old cinnamon roll has arrived

 **SickSmol:** Peggy's 12 too.

 **SickSmol:** Also me and Thomas aren't dating, why the fluff would you think we are? I'm hardcore ace.

 **aNd** **pEggY:** and hardcore gay

 **SickSmol:** Romantic attraction? Blegh.

 **aNd pEggY:** you simp for thomas

 **No** _has joined the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **No** _has left the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **aNd pEggY:** okay let's stop talking about this then

 **aNd pEggY** _has invited_ **No** _to the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **No** _has joined the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **No:** did u run out of ideas 4 my un?

 **SickSmol:** ... you have a United Nations?

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** it stands for username in this case, jem

 **aNd pEggY:** are you sure you're not dating?

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** i'm pretty sure you at least like each other

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** i'm straight and james' aroace i think

 **SickSmol:** I think I am..............

 **aNd pEggY:** hmmmmm

**[aNd pEggY] - [SickSmol]**

**aNd pEggY:** okay real talk here: do you like thomas?

 **SickSmol:** I think so... maybe...

But I've never liked anyone like!! Ever!!

 **aNd pEggY:** you've been best friends with thomas for years, you could be demiro?

 **SickSmol:** Maybe...

 **SickSmol:** I don't know though hnnghh.

 **aNd pEggY:** there there smol

 **SickSmol:** I hate you.

 **aNd pEggY:** nah i'm your bestie besides thomas

 **SickSmol:** Point made but like Tommy's pretty great.

*** Thomas

 **aNd pEggY:** awwww you called him tommy!!

 **SickSmol:** Okay yeah I think I like him.

I just. Don't know the difference between love and other stuff.

But he's just like!! Super nice to me!! And he takes care of me when I'm sick! And cuddles me!! And whenever Alexander insults me in debate class (he doesn't do that too often tbh) he just makes sure I'm okay before anything else!!

I just wanna kiss him!! And cuddle him!! And

Fluff I'm gay.

Don't tell anyone okay?

 **aNd pEggY:** kk

**aNd pEggY >> Meggbury**

**aNd pEggY:** james' gay

 **No:** called it

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** lemme guess, he told you to not tell anyone?

 **aNd pEggY:** yeah but i know y'all won't tell thomas

 **No:** awwww do u trust us?

 **aNd pEggY:** yeah cuz i'm dating both of you???

 **No:** yea good point

 **aNd pEggY:** <3

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** <3 <3 <3

 **No:** <3

sam's pure

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** :33

 **aNd** **pEggY:** anyways i have a plan

**aNd pEggY >> SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)**

**Ay-ayron Burrito** _has joined the group chat_ **SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)** _._

 **Ay-ayron Burrito:** I hate you all so much.


	2. interrogating the macaroni fucker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Meggbury triad interrogates Thomas about his feelings for James.  
> AKA: emotions are hard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided to only make this specific work like three or four chapters long and just make it a series.  
> So we're almost at the end.

**aNd pEggY >> SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)**

**aNd pEggY:** hey gang!

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** hey babe!

 **No:** did u srsly just do that

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** yep!

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** i don't blame burr for hating it here

 **Ay-ayron Burrito:** I just... why is this my username?

 **aNd pEggY:** what if i made your and alex's ship name hamburrito?

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** but i thought it was hamburrger!

 **SickSmol:** Why are y'all texting in class?

**MacAndCheeseFucker >> aNd pEggY**

**MacAndCheeseFucker:** sogkslgf WHY IS JEMMY'S TEXT SAYING Y'ALL SO CUTE?

HE SAYS IT ALL THE TIME.

BUT HERE I AM.

BEING GAY.

I THOUGHT I WAS STRAIGHT.

PEGGY HELP.

 **aNd pEggY:** one second

**aNd pEggY** _has made a group chat._

**aNd pEggY** _has named the group chat_ **macaroni fucker interrogation** _._

**aNd pEggY** _has invited_ **BritishCinnamonRoll** _,_ **No** _and_ **MacAndCheeseFucker** _to the group chat_ **macaroni fucker interrogation** _._

**BritishCinnamonRoll** _has joined the group chat_ **macaroni fucker interrogation**.

**No** _has joined the group chat_ **macaroni fucker interrogation** _._

**MacAndCheeseFucker** _has joined the group chat_ **macaroni fucker interrogation** _._

**MacAndCheeseFucker:** why am i being interrogated?

 **aNd pEggY:** lemme get us all up to speed

 **aNd pEggY** _has sent an image:_ **thomas being gay.png**.

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** well firstly

you could be homoflexible

wait no heteroflexible

whatever

basically it's where you usually like people of your opposite sex

but sometimes you see someone of your same gender and just go pog

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** huh

but like also isn't james aroace?

i don't have a chance with him

i wanna date him, not be in a qpr or whatever... though i would be fine with that i guess.

but then i'd feel weird giving him kisses and i wouldn't be able to tell him i love him.

 **aNd pEggY:** i think he's questioning the aro part

not sure though

also samuel i love your definition of heteroflexible

"but sometimes you see someone of your same gender and just go pog"

why isn't there a pog emoji

:pogchamp:

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** anyways is this the interrogation?

 **aNd pEggY:** no we haven't gotten to the interrogation yet

so

when did you start liking james?

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** i don't know!!

all i know is that when he said y'all earlier i just felt like i did back when i was dating martha

like

it just seemed really cute

and i don't know why

but it made my heart flutter

and like god he's adorable

wait did i just say that

fuck i did

okay at this rate i might as well just write him a fucking love poem

 **aNd pEggY:** of course you have to go overboard

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** if i don't then he won't know it's me

 **No:** hell probably be able 2 tell by ur writing style

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** i'll have you know that my writing style's better when i'm not texting

i mean it's messy

so yeah he'll probably be able to tell

 **aNd pEggY:** do you need help writing it?

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** ... maybe.

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** just write about what you like about him and end it with "affectionately yours, thomas jefferson" with a heart next to it

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** why that specifically?

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** no reason ;3

 **aNd pEggY:** ;-)

 **No:** y'd u give it a nose

 **aNd pEggY:** cuz this ;) looks weird

it was logical

but yeah there's reasoning for it

but it'd explode your small brain

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** i'm big brained

 **No:** rly?

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:**...

**MacAndCheeseFucker** _has left the group chat_ **macaroni fucker interrogation** _._


	3. affectionately yours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AKA: the Jeffmads boys get together.  
> ft. the Jeffmads boys being socially anxious marshmallows.  
> ft. lots of connotation denoters cuz everyone is a mental mess™.  
>  ~~that might sound offensive but i'm a mental mess soooo.~~

**SickSmol >> SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)**

**SickSmol:** So do I not get an answer?

 **Ay-ayron Burrito:** I didn't consent to the in-class texting.

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** no one forced you to...

 **Ay-ayron Burrito:** Y'all were just asking for it.

 **aNd pEggY:** oh no burr has caught the south™

 **SickSmol:** Not the South™.

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** who will catch the south™ next?

 **Ay-ayron Burrito:** This is what I get for being part of the Southern Motherfucking Democratic Republicans, isn't it?

I mean,

Southern's in the name,

so I should've expected it.

**SickSmol >> aNd pEggY**

**SickSmol:** SDSIPDSP($)OSRIKF

PEGGY

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY LOVE LETTERS(?) FROM THOMAS IN MY LOCKER

THEY'RE ALL SO CHEESY

HE DIDN'T EVEN SIGN THEM ALL BUT

IT'S HIM ALL RIGHT

AAAAAAAAAAAAA

HOW DID I THINK I WAS ARO SGPS:FKS

**MacAndCheeseFucker >> aNd pEggY**

**MacAndCheeseFucker:** I AM STALKING JAMES FROM MY LAST CLASS AND

HE'S LIKE

BLUSHING SO MUCH

OH MY GOD IT'S S O CUTE

I'M SO GAY SLSIFS)$R*SFIO

**aNd pEggY >> Meggbury**

**aNd pEggY** _has sent two images_ _:_ **operation jeffmads.png** _and_ **is a success.png** _._

**BritishCinnamonRoll:** as much as i don't like saying the lord's name in vein

t h a n k g o d

james is ace

i'm also ace

but there was s o much sexual tension between them

 **aNd pEggY:** oh my god my phone's vibrating so much lol

angelica and eliza are staring at me like "wtf"

like

this happened pretty much

angelica: peggy what did you do this time

me: i got jeffmads to happen and now they're both having existential crisis's lol

eliza: *slow claps*

 **No:** theos slow clapping 2

she doesnt completely understand whats happening

she doesn't know all of peggys ship names

in short

theo and eliza are like

goals

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** they're dating?

 **aNd pEggY:** yes but that's not the topic at hand

the topic at hand is "are thomas and james talking like normal human beings or texting each other like socially anxious marshmallows?"

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** if they're marshmallows then can i eat them?

/J /J /J

I'M NOT A CANNIBAL

 **aNd pEggY:** SAMUEL SEABURY WTH

 **BritishCinnamonRoll:** *sobs on the floor*

I FORGOT TO PUT /J

 **No:** i hate u both

 **aNd** **pEggY:** we love you too <3

**aNd pEggY >> SickSmol**

**aNd pEggY:** are you talking to each other

like normal human beings

or texting each other

like socially anxious marshmallows

 **SickSmol:** Take a wild guess.

It's me, who has intense social anxiety.

And Thomas, who tries to hide it but is VERY insecure.

It's the second option.

 **aNd pEggY:** istg

**SickSmol >> MacAndCheeseFucker**

**SickSmol:** Thomas I love you but

You're so fluffin' cheesy

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** i mean

h

* uh

yeah i had something to say but then i realized that like

basically this whole idea was mine

anyways

date me

please

 **SickSmol:** I love you so much, yes I'll date you!!

How did I think I was aro for so long hhhhhhhhhhhh

 **MacAndCheeseFucker:** probably cuz we've been friends for so long

and you just didn't notice your feelings for me changed

but anyways

uhhhhh

ew should tlel the others

* we * tell

tf is with me today

 **SickSmol:** Peggy probably already knows.

I'll just send her some screenshots.

**SickSmol >> aNd pEggY**

**SickSmol** _has sent two images:_ **we're.png** _and_ **dating.png** _._

**aNd pEggY:** *scream*

/pos

HELL YEAH!

pffff eliza just asked why i pterodactyl screeched

like

me: *pterodactyl screech*

everyone on the bus: *continuing to vibe*

eliza: peggy what happened now?

me: *verbal key smash* jeffmads

theo: ???

 **SickSmol:** How did you verbally key smash?

 **aNd pEggY:** idk tbh

but i did

anyways send those screenshots to the rest of the smdr

*cocks gun*

or else /j

* /hj

 **SickSmol:** PEGGY WHY ARE YOU ONLY HALF JOKING

PEGGY

P E G G Y

**SickSmol >> SMDR (and samuel and maria AND PEGGY)**

**SickSmol:** Peggy's basically blackmailing me so-

**SickSmol** _has sent two images:_ **we're.png** _and_ **dating.png** _._

**MacAndCheeseFucker:** how was she blackmailing you?

 **SickSmol:** She basically said that if I didn't she'd shoot me.

And then put /hj.

So I'm scared-

 **Ay-ayron Burrito:** Something tells me I was the only one who didn't know this yet but congrats.

... I probably just started Peggy screaming again.

 **aNd pEggY:** this is eliza texting through peggy's phone: yeah you did.

theo has a message to say too.

"help"

 **Ay-ayron Burrito:** Tell her I'm sorry.

 **aNd pEggY:** CONGRATS AGAIN ALEXANDER

SMILE MORE

I'LL SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WAR

IWTIOSFKLSFUNDERSTANEDYOUJDGSSVIFYOUSLMFSMFLOVERTHISGIRLSGJFSFOGSGKSRGETHER

peggy's phone is being confiscated. -eliza

**Author's Note:**

> I have a Tumblr @puppys-random-hamilton-stuff and also have specifically Jeffmads Tumblr @just-jeffmads-shit.


End file.
